The first 4 weeks at home were filled with smiles, tears, laughs, cries, naps, learning, worries, mistakes, and so very much love.
We came home on a Friday night and spent the weekend together with just the 3 of us. (Lots of visitors of course though!) That Sunday my dad and mom came over and made us dinner, cleaned up, and helped out with Caleb. Having a meal fixed and cleaned up for us was such a blessing! Sunday night my parents headed home and my Aunt Marva came to stay with us for the week to help me out while Alan was back at work. This first week at home and following week were filled with me learning how to do a lot of things. I had to figure out more with breastfeeding and pumping, and learn how to try to make my body only make the milk I needed and not tons more. I breastfed openly if it was only girls in my home, haha! Nursing under a cover when learning the whole thing was just too difficult! (Also, any sense of personal space or privacy goes out the window when you have a baby...you just don't care anymore!) I was healing from my c-section still, but managing to get up and down off the floor and from couches just fine. I was dealing w/the whole bleeding mess that comes with having a baby, and that part is just not fun. We were also dealing with wires attached to Caleb too. Picking him up and carrying him around just wasn't a convenient option due to the monitor, so we pretty much stayed downstairs once we came down in the AM and didn't go up back until bed time.
The first week home we had Caleb's 2 week checkup, and my 2 week appt as well. Luckily Aunt Marva was there to help cause I didn't know how I was going to leave the house for the first time alone with him, a diaper bag, AND the monitor. Turns out it wasn't as hard as I thought it would be-but I was definitely grateful I wasn't figuring it out alone the first time. I fed Caleb whenever he was hungry, but tried to stick to the every 3 hours schedule we were on in the hospital. We did diaper changes and got peed on A LOT! Little man thought he was a fountain at diaper change time...it would just shoot up and out and keep on going! haha! :) We learned that Alan would sleep through Caleb crying at night and mommy would wake up to take care of him :) Because of the monitor and wires I wouldn't take him to the nursery at night because it would require unplugging and moving all of that too. So we just set up a little diaper changing place on the floor in the area outside our room and I would sit in the computer chair to nurse him. At weeks end-it wasn't as hard as I'd thought it would be to adjust to a baby at home!
Week number 2 found me and Caleb home alone. We started to establish a routine, specifically in the mornings. I found myself making a goal to be showered and ready for the day by at least noon. And honestly-those first 2 weeks there were lots of days I was barely making that cutoff time. If Caleb didn't sleep well I'd often allow us both to sleep in a little later in the mornings. I was pumping less often to tell my body to stop making so much milk so I wouldn't feel like half my day was spent just pumping. Me and Caleb would take selfie every morning to send to daddy at work. We dealt with lots of throwing up due to his reflux, and I quickly realized that although I had thought the 30ish burp clothes I had made would be too many-in fact-it's barely enough. I felt like I was doing laundry ALL the time. We spent a lot of time taking naps together with Caleb sleeping on my chest-and those moments right there made every other difficult moment completely worth it. :)
Week 3 we got to have Alan's mom come and stay with us for a week! She came on a Saturday I believe and stayed through the next Sunday. Caleb got to get to know his grandma Hubbs that week and loved his cuddle time with her. Janet came with us to Caleb's circumcision appointment that Monday, and also made it to his follow-up appointment that Friday. She also got to come with all of us to Caleb's newborn pictures we did that week! It was such a help to have her there for even just the little things of helping with the diaper bag, bottle, etc. As new parents we feel like we are kinda playing catch-up or running behind all the time, so that little bit of help made a big difference. The end of this third week we celebrated Mother's Day as well. What a special day for me! Historically I have struggled a great deal with this day, as it always made me so sad to not have a little baby of my own. This year was fantastic. Alan surprised me a day early on Saturday with flowers, chocolates, a "Worlds Greatest Mom" mug, a card from him, and a card from Caleb. The cards brought tears to my eyes and I was so grateful for the husband I have who made me a mommy, and all the love and support he is to me. The weekend also ended with Caleb being able to meet his Grandpa Hubbs, Aunt Susan, and cousins Jeff and Austin who all drove down from Idaho. This week was full of memories for sure!
Week 4 found us finally settling in to our routine and life as a family of 3. We were done with visitors and house guests and could finally figure out how to be just us. And while we LOVED all of our visitors, it was a very welcome break to have a quiet house for a few days. We finished Caleb's newborn pics (another post on this and copies of the pics to come) and tried to find new ways to pass our days since we were still stuck indoors! (Doctor told us not to take him out in public until June!) We tried to make it to Alan's softball game this week (even though it was a week or so early to take him outside), but the weather didn't cooperate, so we stayed in again. We did start to take walks this week though and absolutely loved it! Caleb would pass out as soon as we started to walk and I just loved the fresh air and being outside! Life finally felt normal again and we were finally able to get rid of his apnea monitor this week!
We realized that life before Caleb meant we slept in on weekends, got a full nights sleep, and left the house whenever we wanted to just run and grab something quickly. Life with Caleb now meant little sleep, long days, planning to leave the house that sometimes didn't end up being worth it, and we wouldn't trade ANY of it! Caleb is so incredibly perfect and loved and it's unexplainable the worry, love, and care you can have for your child.
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